In the past few weeks, a celebrity couple emerged with the announcement that Zenyatta, reigning Horse of the Year, would be bred with Bernardini, the freshman sire that produced the most graded stakes winners with his first crop of runners in 2010.
With the announcement of the mating, a frenzy of potential “baby names” swirled throughout the media and social networking sites. The Thoroughbred Times held a contest to “Name the Zenyatta-Bernardini Foal.”
I read through a flurry the names proposed by readers in the comment section for the naming contest. Zendini. Bernyatta. Berzen. Attadini. There was even a spin-off from the popular song on the “Zenyatta Mondatta” album, “Don’t Stand so Close to Me.”
The proposed name: “Don’t stand so close to Z.”
Personally, I find it absolutely delightful to ponder ideas for naming Zenyatta’s first foal. Yet, in the spirit of romance, I believe that Zenyatta deserves a little courtship before she dives into motherhood. After all, she is quite possibly the best mare of all time.
As such, I would like to propose a few tips for Bernardini on courting the great mare and future mother of his foal.
Speechless? Being Quiet Isn’t Always a Bad Thing. In a dream world, Bernardini, you might have been able to grab Zenyatta’s attention through saying something like, “I really enjoyed seeing you win nineteen races in a row,” or “I wonder what it would have been like if we met at the track first.”
But, you seem to be the silent type.
It’s not a bad thing to be a quiet guy, Bernardini. Zenyatta seems to enjoy a little silence with her famous cotton ball-stuffed ears. Instead of trying to win her heart with your personality, take the time to learn about her favorite things.
How do you figure out what pleases a Grade I girl? Not to worry, Bernardini. Zenyatta keeps a diary that says a lot about what she loves and what people have done to show their love for the great mare.
It might do some good to rifle though her diary and find the perfect way to show your affection for the beautiful mare. It may be as simple as handing her a Guinness or helping her paint a picture for Thoroughbred charity. A basket of apples or a few carrots also seem to capture her fancy.
Yet, ultimately, Zenyatta seems to simply enjoy kindness and attention above all else. And thankfully, it doesn’t take a word to convey those sentiments. It just takes a little extra thought and effort. Make the effort, Bernardini. She’s worth every minute of it.
Rings and Things? Money Doesn’t Win Hearts. Are you having trouble finding a hoof-sized diamond ring to show how much you care? Don’t worry about it, Bernardini.
In a fairy tale world, it sure would have been a pleasure to see you get down on bended knee and ask for Zenyatta’s approval in mating. You could have surprised her in the middle of one of her standing ovations in front of an adoring crowd. I can’t even imagine how many fans would have viewed your proposal on YouTube.
Yet, Zenyatta doesn’t seem to mind being non-traditional, Bernardini. Forget about rings and fancy things. This great mare has enough career earnings to buy her own bling for any occasion.
Rather than material things, love wins a good woman’s heart. If you’re trying to court this Grade I girl, spend some time just adoring her unique personality. Watch her dance around the paddock. Take a few minutes to consider the accomplishments in her racing career. She may have beat a few of your guy friends in the past. Not bad for bragging rights, is it?
And, in the end, gaze at the big girl and wonder, “Will I ever see another one like her again?” You probably won’t. Enjoy her company while she is in your presence. Her fans certainly did.
Passing out Cigars? It May Take a Few Tons of Them to Celebrate your Future Foal. I don’t mean to add any pressure here, Bernardini. Yet, if you plan on passing out cigars to celebrate the delivery of your baby, you may need a couple extra boxes for her fans. I’d recommend a few hundred thousand extra boxes at a minimum.
What is a guy to do when faced with such a dilemma? Forget about the cigars and just send out a picture of the baby. I imagine that simple photo will be shared on social media sites faster than Zenyatta’s closing charge in the home stretch. You see, many folks are just as excited as you about the arrival of your future foal with Zenyatta.
Yet, after the foal is born, please remember that anything is possible for their future career. A lot of chatter may focus on whether the foal can follow in the footsteps, or “dance steps,” of their parents. Nevermind these debates or hopes in the racing community.
Yes, it is fun to marvel at the possibilities for your future foal with Zenyatta. And, don’t get me wrong, Bernardini. I would be thrilled if you two had a foal that was equally competitive in dance contests and Grade I outings.
However, in the end, it would be a prize just to have a healthy foal.
And, it is a victory just to be the guy that wins a Grade I girl.
Whatever lies beyond those moments, the story will be told when your foal takes their first step onto a racetrack.
